Living with Dementia?
We invite you to join us on
Sunday, June 1 at 1:00 PM for a special Lunch and Learn

Please feel free to invite family and friends. All are welcome.

Wow! What a busy month May has been and it isn't over yet! There is an upcoming webinar on Thursday, May 29th on Mild Cognitive Impairment (“What You Should Know – from diagnosis to the latest research”) You can certainly register for this session being held from 5:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. and you can register for the May 29 session here. There will be another session on Wednesday, June 4th from 2:00 to 3:30 p.m. Mild Cognitive Impairment involves memory loss that is greater than expected for one’s age but not enough to compromise one’s ability to carry out daily activities. In this session you will learn about Mild Cognitive Impairment, its types and diagnosis, the difference between Mild Cognitive Impairment, normal forgetfulness and dementia and the methods to optimize cognitive health through lifestyle choices and social support.

As we are having a special Lunch & Learn with Dr. Herman Chique-Alfonzo on Sunday, June 1st at 1:00 p.m. we will NOT be holding our regular Wednesday evening session this week. Please do join us, however, for lunch after our regular Sunday service to learn more about brain health. Dr. Chique-Alfonzo has been a great supporter of our group and we are truly blessed by his presence. For those who are not regular members of St. Andrew's, we welcome you to our service if you wish to join us or simply come around 12:30 and we'll feed you lunch, Please let the office know if you will attending, however (office@standrewsottawa.ca or call 613 232-9042 and speak to Vivian)

Deb has very kindly sent an article from the Toronto Star and we have "translated" it below. As always, we look forward to seeing you on June 1st and perhaps even at one of the webinars. Very best regards

Pauline, Jeanie & Laura

Toronto Star Article dated today, May 25, 2025

What I Learned About Life And Death

Do “with” rather than “for”. Find purpose and joy in every day. Live ‘til you die. These are the three principles for delivering a good death with dementia that I learned in a recent visit to two Green Care Farms in the Netherlands. These farms were small, privately owned businesses in rural Netherlands, adjacent to small settlements. They provide care to people when their dementia requires 24-7 supervision, and all-day, every week-day, daycare for the months or years prior to requiring residential care as a respite and on-boarding strategy. My visit validated everything I thought I’d learned caring for my husband at home as he drifted through dementia to death, including that he was further along in the disease than the medical world recognized because he managed “Daily Living Activities” until the week before he took to his bed and died. That he was never “as bad” as the horror stories of late-stage dementia may mean, to some extent, our culture creates the conditions that nurture the horror caregivers report. If we plunk people with diminishing cognitive capacity in a strange and sterile environment that restricts their physical independence and impose schedules and procedures that neutralize their individuality, can we be surprised if they come angry, frustrated, dehumanized and unmanageable? If we do indeed create the conditions that nurture a slow and pathetic decline, it is because our culture denies death. We position death as an event best postponed, hopefully avoided entirely. In nature, which is the omnipresent “green”

ingredient in Green Care Farms, death is the absence of life, as dialectical and liminal as day becoming night, warm becoming cold, good becoming bad. If we embrace death as a normal part of life, it makes sense to live fully, whatever that means, in the moment. The mantra in the Green Care Farms was to enable every person, staff and person with dementia alike, to find joy and purpose every day, in any way that presented itself. They interacted with nature – weather, plants, animals, soil. They interacted with each other in a holistic, humanistic, non-hierarchical way. They shared work, food, cleanup, laughter, frustration. The formula for finding joy and purpose in life was for staff to do “with” not “for.” As anyone who has raised a toddler knows, this requires time and patience. An adult can tie shoelaces in a jiffy, but allowing a child to tie their own shoes nurtures independence and self-reliance. It feeds personhood. If old age is the downside of the hill of life, why not adapt some strategies that were useful on the way up? Both stages are preparation for life – we just don’t know much about the life after death. The majority of persons resident in Green Care Farms carried on their daily routines until they lay down, for about a week, and died. The lived ‘til they died. They had a quick decline and a good death. How often can we say that about people with dementia in our culture? I like the idea that the persons with dementia who seemed to decide the time had come and do death deftly were taking responsibility for that transition.. Perhaps they were as self-confident as youth who successfully launch into adulthood. Perhaps they believed that joy and purpose could be found equally, perhaps more easily, on the other side of the portal. That was certainly the impression my husband’s peaceful passing made on me. But what about all the bad behaviours we “know” are associated with late-stage dementia? Wandering, aggression, waiting to be elsewhere, not eating, not sleeping, progressive physical frailty. As in my personal experience, these symptoms seemed minimal and managed in GCFs. And, as in my experience, tended to be interpreted by my medically-oriented companions in these visits as proof the persons with dementia weren’t that far along in the illness. We know children’s behaviour is highly influenced by their environments, that they behave quite differently at home, in school and with peers. Why should such responsiveness to circumstances be different when cognition is on the other side of the developmental curve? We could manage people with dementia much better by applying these three lenses – do “with” rather than “for”, find purpose and joy in each day, live until you die – to each aspect of our care for them. But will we?

Fay Martin, MSW, PhD, has advocated and organized for social justice including appropriate housing throughout her adult life.

Tip of the Month 2025

February: Playlist: Stronger Together

March: Play “Canoku” (like Sudoku but with Canadian icons)(https://www.canucklegame.ca/canoku/) or “Canuckle” (like Wordle)(https://www.canucklegame.ca/)

April: Challenge Dementia Stigma This Alzheimer’s Awareness Month (https://dementiahelp.ca/dementiaaware/)

Educational Resources 2025

February: Our topic for the month is dealing with the stigma which surrounds a dementia/Alzheimer’s diagnosis. Our resource is Flippingstigma.com. In addition, there is wonderful information at https://alzheimer.ca/en/about-dementia/stigma-against-dementia

March: We continued our discussion of stigma which surrounds a dementia/Alzheimer’s diagnosis and learned about the Defy Dementia podcast (www.baycrest.org/podcast). In addition, Pauline suggested we check out www.changeltcnow.ca This is associated with CARP.

April: We had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. German Chique-Alfonzo, Director of Education and Programs at the Dementia Society of Ottawa and Renfrew County. He spoke further about the stigma associated with a dementia diagnosis and pointed out the five areas where these can manifest itself. As a resource, he recommended studying the World Alzheimer Report 2024 (http://www.alzint.org/resource/world-alzheimer-report-2024/)

We are anxious to serve your needs and would love to hear from you.  Please contact Pauline Schneider (gas@swcp.com), Jeanie Hicks (jh1948@hotmail.com) or Laura McGregor (ljm90star@gmail.com) for further information or to be added to our invitation list.  We look forward to seeing you on the 1st.